It’s been requested that I let you know
the flaws of a certain black belt in Judo.
Now how daft would a man have to be
to bad mouth the ex-head of the FSB?
How many killing arts does the KGB teach?
By pen or spoon alone, it’s got to be ten each.
That’s not even speaking of ricin or Polonium.
“Too passé?” Next time they’ll try out some Zirconium.
[How bored must a killer be to go so exotic –
passing on tried bullets to test out the quixotic?]
I really hate to disappoint my dear reader,
but this writer has been known to be a bleeder.
I know not all enemies does Putin kill;
some he films from a perch outside their window sill.
[I’m not saying I have a closet of skeletons,
but there’s this film featuring a pool full of gelatin.]
There are some facts that are really without dispute
that I mustn’t remind you have led to an ill-repute
Putin’s first act upon the resignation of Yeltsin
was absolving his boss’s family of any and all sins.
Medvedev’s first act was equally sinister.
He made his old boss the new Prime Minister.
Some’ve accused them of blowing up those four commy-condos,
but who killed those people is a thing no one alive [for long] knows.
[Just the fact that some think they did it, makes one go “DAMN!”
But, for the record, those in search of an accuser, I’m not your man.]
They say there’s no way to find corruption in the [petro-] empire.
They must have those same mirrors once owned by a vampire.
Yes, let the record show that I didn’t attack the tandemocracy.
Never once in this post appeared the dreadful word “kleptocracy.”
On the other hand, maybe I’ll write an exposé. What the heck.
Hey, is this some kind of syringe stuck in my neck…