So You Think You Want Superpowers?

Superheroes conjure glitz and glamour
putting arch nemeses in the slammer.
But heroism has its moments mundane.
It’s not just a life of bringing the pain.


The Hulk can’t get his deposit back
because his ceiling has a nasty crack.
What’s Wonder Woman hear with her truth lasso?
“You’ve got a nice rack, but you dress like a ho.”
And the FAA insists she use running lights,
foiling the gain of a jet defying sight.
Superman’s library book is long overdue,
entitled “Kryptonite Poisoning and You.”
Librarians take these matters seriously,
bullying the Man of Steel imperiously.
Through a school zone, Flash did a million.
His ticket was approximately $6.2 billion.
The fish went on strike against Aquaman
when they found Tilapia bits in his frying pan.
Batman and Robin are getting hate mail
about rumors of a lifestyle male on male.
Tony Stark’s patent recently expired.
Now you too can be Iron Man attired.
Wolverine has been terribly teased
because of a losing battle with fleas.
Captain Atom has been seeing a shrink.
Being really tiny isn’t as cool as you’d think.


So before you step into that Gamma ray
you should listen now to what I say.
If you want to live a life of tranquility,
choose for your power… invisibility.

About B Gourley

Bernie Gourley is a writer living in Bangalore, India. His poetry collection, Poems of the Introverted Yogi is now available on Amazon. He teaches yoga, with a specialization in pranayama, and holds a RYT500 certification. For most of his adult life, he practiced martial arts, including: Kobudo, Muay Thai, Kalaripayattu, and Taiji. He is a world traveler, having visited more than 40 countries around the globe.
This entry was posted in Humor, Poetry, Writing and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to So You Think You Want Superpowers?

  1. This is so witty and entertaining! I posted a link to you on FB – my brother and his friends will like this! 🙂

  2. Miscellaneous Writer says:

    I love comic books and this post was hilarious! Thanks for all the awesome poetry and keep it up!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s