Tag Archives: Humor

How to Kill a Rogue Yard Gnome, Part 3 of 4

Notes: a.)    Part I can be read here. b.)   Part II can be read here. c.)    Sorry, I meant to do this in three installments, but this one was getting long. d.)   For the best reading experience, assume all of the continuity gaffes in … Continue reading

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NASA Finds Poetry of Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings

The poetry of Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, England was thought to have been completely lost when the Earth was demolished to make way for an interstellar expressway. However, a scrap was found adrift in space. Scientists believe the sheer awfulness of the poem may have made it impervious to incineration, which is to say that the rays of the Vogon demolition beams refused to land upon the piece. Continue reading

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Drunken Monkey Got No Kung Fu

[NO ANIMALS WERE INJURED IN THE WRITING OF THIS POEM.] jungle nights, so very scary creepy-crawlies, beasties hairy caws, screeches, and echoed calls no protection of moat or walls just the thinnest nylon tent then, an idea, heaven-sent who can … Continue reading

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Once I ruled the parade

It’s the nation’s bicentennial,
and I’m in the parade.

In a small town,
everyone is in the parade,
except the cheek-pinchers
and crotchety Gus.
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Haiku Correspondence with Nature

Dear Tick, I admire
your most resolute nature,
but please unhand me!
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Zombies are Coming to Town

Ignoring pains.
They seek your brains.
The Zombies are coming to town.

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childhood roadtrip memories: or, “that boy ain’t right!”

two fireflies in a jar riding cross-country by car sitting in the back seat dangling my little feet i’m Etch-a-Sketching doodles looks like a bowl of noodles but sans the bowl it’s got no soul just a bunch of squiggly … Continue reading

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Tyler Durden Was Right: or, The [Sad] Meaning of Life

Tyler Durden was right. We are consumers, all. If we don’t buy needless crap our entire economy will stall. They hook you as a little kid with endless serial toys, Fun Meal promises reel you in, “collect all six, have … Continue reading

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2012: the Bright Side of Apocalypse

2012 is approaching. The end it must be nigh. There’s no reason to think the ancient Mayans would lie.   They may not have had indoor plumbing, and couldn’t foresee their own demise. But, still, let’s give them some credit … Continue reading

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So You Think You Want Superpowers?

Superheroes conjure glitz and glamour putting arch nemeses in the slammer. But heroism has its moments mundane. It’s not just a life of bringing the pain.   The Hulk can’t get his deposit back because his ceiling has a nasty … Continue reading

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